The title reflects exactly how I feel right now. Five years of work, all coming to an end. Being able to finally see the great white light after trudging through all the filth that litters the dark, wet tunnel.
The journey has been long and laborious. At times I questioned my own sanity for wanting to put myself through it all. After all, there are many jobs other than medicine; and there is more to life than a career. I still remember being the naive, bright-eyed lad entering medical school for the first time and thinking 'Wow, this place is great!'. I recall entering my clinical years and doubting myself at times when the going appeared to be getting too tough. But most of all, I remember being enveloped with the dizzying feeling of exhiliration whenever I could make a difference in a patients life, no matter how small that difference might be. The smile of a recovering child, the kind words of a grateful wife or the joyful tears of the first-time mom - these were the things that kept me going, that provided me wth a sense of gratification I have yet to find elsewhere.
It's kinda funny, really. Just 2 weeks ago, there were so many tasks to be accomplished, so many books to read, so many uncertainties about the future. Now, all that has melted away. For the first time in five years, I can sit back and truly relax without the sinking feeling of guilt that my time should be better spent memorizing drug names and side effects, reading that newly released clinical guideline or practising clinical skills at the bedside. My life is mine once again. Time to get out of the medical enclave and explore the real world. Catch up with long-lost friends. Improve physical fitness. Rediscover old interests and explore new ones. Smell the flowers, see the beauty of the morning sunrise, hear the songs of birds, feel the cool breeze caressing my skin.
At long last, I get to live like a normal human being again. My tour of duty is complete. Aaaah, paradise!!!
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